Are you getting older? Can you not really remember what happened yesterday or even five minutes ago? Where did I put my glasses? What was I doing again? Oh, yeah. I was writing this new feature. Who Remembers…? will be a series of articles where I will be taking a look back at some of the best and worst games from days of old. There will be some reminiscing, a few treasured memories and maybe, at times, too much use of the rose tinted glasses.

Born To Grill? They Made A Funny!

Who Remembers… Hogs Of War?

Hogs Of War released on the glorious Playstation 1 and also on the PC in the year 2000. Hogs Of War (or HOW as I shall call it from now on) was a turn based combat game that was truly unique at the time it came out.

The only other turn based combat games that gamers had played before this revolved largely around the 2d world of Worms. Worms was truly influential in the design process for HOW because the game clearly took it’s basic premise from those high-pitched pesky worm-folk. The younger readers amongst you may not even know what Worms is, so here is a quick, basic description Worms; Worms was a 2d game, your team of worms had to destroy all of the other enemy worms. You had one turn to move your worm and launch an attack or defensive manoeuvre and then the enemy had a chance to attack or launch a defensive move. HOW worked in exactly the same way, you had a time limit to move your hog around the map and launch an attack or defensive move on the enemy.

The only game that seems to compare to HOW these days in terms of gameplay is the highly rated (and rightly so) Xcom Enemy Unknown. Now you know how HOW and the games that influenced it worked let’s get back to remembering fondly the wonderful world of HOW.


HOW was narrated by Bottom and The Young One’s star Rik Myall. Rik’s comedic quips about the other hogs often had me chuckling along as I filled a little piggy full of lead. The hogs each had their own names and the two that spring to my mind are Gunther and Brian. I shall name my unborn children Gunther and Brian in homage to these two hogs*. Brian and Gunther’s name shall go down in the history books as being characters from one of the most fun games of all time! *Note – Jonmau5 may or may not actually call his children Brian and Gunther.

I Spy With My Piggy Eye A Hog That’s About To Go Splat!

The level environments or maps were not your usual shades of grey, copy and paste, Call Of Duty style maps. The HOW levels were imaginative, often colourful and were always unique in terms of gameplay tactics. The green rambling hills and valleys would make for some calculations with bullet drops and who would attempt to control the high ground. The moon based level played havoc with your characters movement and grenades due to the low gravity.

The conventional weapons were all correct and present with your expected sniper rifles, bazookas and the like all being used to barbecue that pork. However, the weapons used within HOW were as unique as the levels at times. The tanks, pillboxes and turrets could be used to maximise the effect of your attacks and to make for some spectacularly graphic kills, often sending Brian or Gunther hurtling through the air. Who could forget the coolest inventory item… Three words. The rocket jetpack. This jetpack allowed your pigs to fly! Pigs can fly!

This Herr Strike Will Show ‘Em!

There has been a lot of call for HOW to be released via the classics section of the Playstation Store. There has been rumours flying around recently of a possible reboot of the series but until then we can only attempt to get hold of an old Playstation 1 copy and relive, relove and remember.

Now Off To The Front Line You Go! There’s A War On!

This is something I hope to be able to turn into a regular series of articles, so if you would like to submit a game from the past to appear under the Vault’s dazzling underground spotlights, then reply with a comment beneath this post and tell us the name of the game.